Page 1 of What are peoples classic jokes?

after those class bush jokes, was wunderin what everyones fav jokes are:

1- Yesterday i had 20 pints of yoghurt,
I was Mullard.

2- why dont blind people sky dive?
Its scares the **** out of their dogs

3- Man alks into a pub and says ouch!

probably wont amuse as you guys as much as me but found them hilarious!
Whats your favs?

You say pyscho like its a bad thing

Here`s a silly one.
Man comes out the doctor`s and sees his mate. Mate says to him "How did you get on ?"
Man replies " Doctor says I`ve got hermes"
Mate says "You mean herpes"
Man: "No, doctor says I`m a carrier"

JohnF

GW6UFO is QRT at the moment

1. Two cows in a field, one turns to the other and says
"Are you scared of this mad cow disease thats going aorund?"
"Nope!" says the 2nd cow
"Why Not?"
"Cos i`m a helicopter"

2. Did you hear about the bloke attacked by a prawn cocktail?

That was just for starters!

3. Did you hear about the farmer who was also a magician?

He turner his tractor in to a field.

Class...

4. Two goldfish in a tank...

One says to the other "Do you know how to drive this thing?"

A bloke goes to the doctors with a bit of lettuce up his bum.
The doctor examines the bloke and says
"I have some bad news , I am afraid that is only the tip of the eisburg"..
:/

Q: What`s brown and sticky?

A: A stick.

Two bulls on the top of a hill looking down at a field of cows. The younger bull turns to the elder and says "Let`s run down to that field and f*ck one of those cows".
The elder bull replies: "Let`s walk down, and f*ck them all".

Nick

Bloke goes into a pet shop and says to the assistant.

"I`d like to buy a wasp"

Assistant replies.

"Sorry sir we don`t sell wasps"

Customer

"You`ve got one in the window"


JohnF

GW6UFO is QRT at the moment

Paddy and murphy walking down the road.
Paddy finds a mirror and looks in it. he says "I recognize that person but i cant think who it is."
Murphy says "give us the mirror." "oh yea you tw4t. no wonder you recognize him , ITS ME.!!!"

Knock Knock
Who`s There?
Rude interupting cow
Rude interu.....
MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Works better saying it. :)

Editor
DVD REVIEWER

Mickey Mouse goes to see his solicitor about getting a divorce from Minnie. After a bit of a chat the solicitor says "But I don`t think having big teeth is grounds for a divorce". And Mickey says `I didn`t say she had big teeth, I said she was foocking Goofy"!

Tommy Cooper (does the voice...)
Man goes to the Doctor,
"Doctor, I`ve broken my arm in several places"
Doctor:-" Well don`t go to those places then"
Ahaha-justlikethat.

d[at]ivñci