Review of Chase, The: Series 2

Introduction

It`s a clear indication of just how much broadcast television I watch these days, that I had absolutely no idea of what The Chase was when I received a disc to review. A quick look at the synopsis left me with the impression that it was a children`s drama. It was only later that I realised that it was one of those Sunday night, primetime theme soaps, of the same ilk as Monarch Of The Glen, or Heartbeat that manages to attract inconceivably large audiences ("If I don`t watch them, why should anyone else?" he asks with typical reviewer arrogance). This little slice of life was set in the rural idyll around a family veterinary practice called The Chase. Penned by Kay Mellor, it ran for 20 episodes over 2 series. The second series lasted for 12 episodes and is presented here over three discs. The reviewer`s lot being what it is, I received only disc 1 to review, containing the first 4 episodes of the series as well as some bonus features. It`s also the dreaded blue of a DVD-R, but since it is a dual layer disc, it probably is of the same technical specification as the final disc, although specs may change in the interim.

Chevin Chase is the veterinary practice in question. Run by the Williams family consisting of George and his daughters Anna and Sarah, it has been a mainstay of the rural community. At the end of the previous season, George had briefly married `bimbo` Claudie before being killed in a car accident. Now Claudie has half shares in the family home and practice, and her equally irritating family show up to move in. Vet Rick`s affair with assistant Claire is discovered, and receptionist wife Deborah throws him out. Anne`s husband Tom wants to move back in, but she can`t forgive him for fathering a child with her cousin Fiona. Meanwhile it turns out that George wasn`t Anna`s father and Fiona is actually her…

Look, everyone over the age of 16 is sleeping with everyone else. Everyone has a dark past, and there`s plenty of friction. What more do you expect from a soap?

Video

It`s broadcast quality 1.78:1 anamorphic, and it`s all pleasant enough to watch. But with nearly four hours of footage squeezed onto one disc, pressing pause will evince some rather obvious compression artefacts. This isn`t the type of programme that you want to stop occasionally just to savour any eye-candy though. There are some nausea inducing shaky cam moments, which just don`t look good filmed in digi-vision.

Audio

A DD 2.0 Stereo English track that does what it says on the proverbial tin. There aren`t any bells and whistles in the programme to make your system tremble and the dialogue (given the occasional regional accent) is clear enough. Subtitles are conspicuous by their absence. The one moment in the show when my ears perked up was when I heard Transvision Vamp playing in the pub.

Features

The disc that I got had a three-page biography for Kay Mellor, 10 pages of filmographies for ten of the cast members and a thirty-second slideshow gallery.

Conclusion

Thank God that I didn`t have to review all three discs! Having seen these four episodes, I begin to wonder if I wasn`t all that wrong with that children`s drama crack. Of course I`m probably the wrong audience for this series. I stopped watching soaps voluntarily when shoulder-pads were in fashion. But there is something so dated about The Chase, something so twee and old-fashioned, that I have difficulty believing that it was made this decade, let alone this year. It plays very much like Last Of The Summer Wine but with Viagra, a sort of All Creatures Great And Small but with contemporary women, with women problems. This show is very much from a female perspective, the male characters are just there as eye-candy, scum of the earth or soggy pieces of lettuce, whereas the women are strong, independent, forthright and outspoken.

The writing is creaky; it feels like a series of clichés delivered by a collection of stereotypes. The drama takes place with the main characters, while the supporting cast show up to provide some comedy, with neither aspects really gelling well in my opinion. We have Rick, one browbeaten, wet haddock of a vet, who has raised up enough gumption to have an affair, and who tries and fails to keep it hidden from his sour faced harridan of a wife Deborah. Of course no one can stand said sour faced bat, but she is the only one who can keep the practice organised. The hypochondriac practice nurse is always flustered, continually fanning herself to keep from sweating, and downing enough medication to put the average raver in orbit. Then there is the pink family bimbo. Claudie is annoying, superficial, loves pink, and is painfully loud, but has a heart of gold that peeks out from time to time. Her sister Paula makes an entrance in the first episode. Or rather her breasts precede her by a good thirty seconds, almost blinding one of Anne`s sons (Did I mention that Anne is a full time vet, and single mother of four, able to castrate a bull and breastfeed simultaneously?) Paula proceeds to pink up the place even further, combining a beauty parlour with the veterinary practice, adding to the confusion for the secretaries. "What`s a Brazilian?" "What`s a landing strip?" Then himbo brother Liam shows up, takes his top off and proceeds to do some carpentry…

Sister Sarah seems to be trying to compete for the sour faced battleaxe accolade, spending most of the time sucking lemons, especially when faced with Claudie and her clan. The only time she seems halfway likeable is when she has to deal with the Queen of the sour faces Deborah, who currently keeps her husband`s testicles in a jar. Frankly four hours of The Chase was enough for me, the contrived plotting, the achingly familiar feel to the show, the utter farce of the stories, was all more torment than entertainment. God bless the actors for making a go of it, but this felt like a masterclass in how to make mediocre television. It isn`t bad, it certainly isn`t good, and it should have remained buried in the nineteen-eighties. But… watch enough of it and it does grow on you. Like mould. I`m sure given enough time I could eventually become inured to the inanity of it all. But let`s face it, a vet show isn`t a vet show without someone losing a Rolex up a cow, or Rolf Harris looking at a piece of roadkill and asking "Can you guess what it is yet?"

The Chase is time travel TV, it looks contemporary on the outside but has a sensibility buried in the past. If you are looking for the television equivalent of a comfortable pair of slippers, then this show will probably serve. Personally I`d have to be sedated before I watch this again.